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[He can see that confusion in the way his eyes widen, that brief glance before Dirk's eyes return to the floor. And it hurts to look at, in a way that Hajime can't exactly explain to himself or put into concrete terms, an empathetic ache in his chest. So he doesn't hesitate when he answers,]

Yeah, I do. [Maybe if he says it, it'll help Dirk understand how sincere he's being. He wouldn't have offered if it weren't something he wanted to do, after all.] I don't think you will.

[Dirk's his own person, he could do something to make Hajime uncomfortable if he really wanted to? But unintentionally? He doubts it. So he steps in to close the distance, wrapping his arms around the other boy in a loose, easily-escapable hug.]

[Dirk doesn't respond at first, not anything more than a flicker of tension. He is trying to make his brain shut up. This is stupid, because Hinata doesn't need to be dealing with this crap, because Dirk created this situation and he needs to care care of it. How badly is he fucking up if he's dragging a total outsider into this?

Roxy loves him. Jake spends time with him because he wants to take care of him. Hinata isn't an outsider, because Hinata is a friend.

Very carefully, half-uncertain of what he's doing, he returns the embrace.]

[When Dirk hugs him back, Hajime exhales a quiet, relieved breath, tightening his grip into a proper hug. He's... honestly not given that many hugs in his life, but it's not to the point where it's unnatural. More that he just wants to make sure Dirk can pull back if he changes his mind, if he doesn't want to do this.]

I don't know what's bothering you, Dirk, [he murmurs, closing his eyes and tightening his embrace just a little more.] And you don't... have to tell me if you don't want to. Just... don't shut out the people who care about you. Okay?

[It's what he's always done. Can't talk to Roxy, it's too complicated. Jane's a conflict of interest, Jake's the problem. Don't want to burden any of them. AR can't be trusted. Cal was the only one, all those years, the only one he could tell anything, the only one he could share everything with. The only person he never shut out.

His eyes shut, and he doesn't pull away.]

I promise I'm working on it. It's near the top of the list of things to stop failing at.

Okay.

[That's all he can ask for, he's coming to realize. He tilts his head carefully, letting the side of it bump against Dirk's in a small, slightly silly way to catch his attention.]

If there's anything you need... I'm here for you. No matter what.

[Even if he doesn't have a talent. Even if he can't fight, or write programs, or build robots. Even if there's a laundry list of things he can't do, he still wants to become someone that people can rely on.

But right now, all he can do is stand here, keeping Dirk in his embrace until the other boy pulls away, or the fish starts to burn. Whichever comes first.]

[It is so hard to rely on anyone else. Failing is unacceptable. Fucking up is always a disaster. He has to do it all on his own, he has to be better, he can't depend on anyone else. He's alone.

He is trying so hard to remember he isn't the last man alive anymore.]

It will be hard to accept that if you won't remember it goes both ways.

[It's true. He can't stand relying on someone who won't rely on him. It feels too wrong after all of these years of standing on his own.]

...I won't forget.

[When he's ready to talk about the island, Dirk will be the first one he'll try to turn to. He's already made that decision, it's just... following through with it. It's frightening, to talk about the things that happened to him, and to Kazuichi. And if any of their classmates show up... he doesn't want anyone to be suspicious of them. They've had enough of that life, they really have.

But he just sighs quietly and keeps the side of his head pressed gently against Dirk's, still holding him in a warm embrace. Movies have told him that it should be feeling awkward, and maybe Dirk is, but for Hajime...? He's genuinely comfortable like this, closing his eyes and exhaling another calm breath.]

I think I've known that for a while.

[Dirk doesn't know how long hugs are supposed to be. He and Dave used to cling for hours sometimes. Cal never protested an hours-long embrace. Kaden was too cuddly to ever inform Dirk on that. Roxy is a clinger at best. He doesn't know at all when to let go.]

Okay. Cool.

[It isn't a very helpful reply. It's just the best one he has. He can't push Hinata, just as Hinata can't push him.]

[It's a decent enough reply. While he'd like to know exactly what it is that's bothering his friend, try to figure out exactly what he can do to help... maybe something like this is enough.

He exhales quietly, keeping his arms wrapped tightly around the other boy. It's nice? And while it's easy to pretend that he's doing this solely for Dirk's benefit... he can't help the way it relaxes him, too. Maybe it's something he should try to do more often.

He inhales again, parting his lips as if to say something, maybe something suitably protagonist-like and cool-- then pauses, eyes flying open as he tries to jolt back from the hug.]

Crap, it's gonna burn-!

[The fish. Let him get back to the stove before the food is ruined.]

[Dirk immediately lets him go.]

We should consider saving emotional heart-to-hearts for moments when we aren't cooking.

Hah, yeah, I agree with that.

[He's still smiling, though, in spite of that. The makeshift marinade is kind of sticking to the pan, but it's not as bad as it could have been. He grabs some plates and starts actually putting it together, fish, veggies, and rice. It's... actually kind of a nice meal, assuming everything turned out okay. Almost enough to remind him of home.]

But... I'm glad we had it. Thanks.

[And he offers the plate to the other boy with a small smile. Eat your god damn homecooked meal, then you can go back to just eating oranges dude.]

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