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No, it's okay, don't apologize. It just takes me a little longer to understand those kinds of things, you know?

[Of course Dirk knows. Dirk knows exactly how ordinary Hajime is. But he's refusing to dwell on that right now, instead glancing past the glass of water to meet Dirk's eyes again.]

I think that's a good idea, then. Let's implement it, and then maybe... have you gotten a chance to see about uploading the map?

Yeah, I've copied it in and linked it to the one in the tech lab. It should update automatically as long as you're within range.

[He is also casually writing in the code so they can do the randomized egg thing because multitasking with shades.]

That's great.

[He buries his head against his shoulder with another muffled cough, closing his eyes. No reason to keep his eyes open while they're discussing this? He believes Dirk when he says the map is uploaded already.]

I think something like that will make it easier for people to explore outside the base. If they can tell which way is home... it makes it a little less intimidating, I think. In the open ocean.

It might lead to fewer disappearances.

[Dirk brings that up in his usual monotone. It's still a point of concern. He doesn't know how people vanish, or why, and it unnerves him. He thinks it might be into the Void but it's impossible to tell.

Hinata don't hang out with Dirk he never makes people feel better.]

...Maybe.

[His voice is a quiet murmur in response, the slight, pleased smile that had been curving his lips fading at the corners. There's a harsh pain in the center of his chest whenever he thinks about that, and a shiver that has nothing to do with his fever shakes his body.]

Hey, Dirk... [It's still a quiet murmur, though he's opened his eyes by now. Not looking toward the other boy, but just staring at a point somewhere beyond him. The mural, probably, though his gaze doesn't seem focused on it.] Am I imagining it, or... have a lot of people who woke up on the Monolith vanished...?

[Faize, Lymle, Anna... maybe it's just his bad luck, but...]

...Yeah. You're right.

[It unsettles him. A common thread. No explanation. Could Hinata vanish? Dirk doesn't want him to. But there's no way to know, to help...]

...

[He pulls his blankets up closer to his chin, pressing his lips tightly together. He can pretend it's just to try to hold back another cough that shakes his shoulders, but that's not it.]

...I don't want to disappear.

[He can't help but say it aloud. Vanishing, disappearing, being erased; it claws at him in a way that hurts to even think about verbalizing, but he has to. Because if he says so, then surely, surely, he won't.

Good going, Dirk, he's Upset.]

Edited 2016-08-18 02:31 (UTC)

[God. He is so bad at people skills. And he's too scared to offer any real comfort. He's been rejected too much by the person he needs the most acceptance from to be able to do that.

Even so, very quietly, he reaches out to him with his voice.]

I don't want that either.

[But there isn't anything they can do yet. And Dirk has always accepted hopeless things for what they are. For a moment, he's silent. Then he takes up a slice of an orange and he holds it out to Hinata.]

[It's not much of a comfort. Or rather -- it's a comfort for the wrong thing. It's a comfort for Hajime's sometimes-still-lacking self-esteem, the feeling that people who are so incredible, so talented, wouldn't want someone like him to be around them.

But it doesn't help at all with the very real possibility that he might just... go out on an expedition, and never return. It makes him want to find someone to go with him, any time he might go out. But he also doesn't want to take anyone away from anyone else, either. If something happens...

He blinks, trying to focus on what Dirk is holding out to him, and reaches out his hand to take it before he really realizes what it is. Oh. An orange slice.]

Thanks. That... means a lot for you to say.

[So while he still looks miserable, he pops the orange slice into his mouth to suck on the juice. So of course now he just looks miserable and ridiculous, because no one can be taken seriously when they have the rind of an orange between their lips like a weird smile.]

[There's a pause. And then Hinata's communicator beeps. Surprise! Attached is a picture of Hinata, taken by Dirk's shades, right now.

Hinata deserves to also see what he looks like.]

[Now what's beeping, has Dirk been coding...

He pauses and checks, cheeks flaring a sudden bright pink as he spits the orange into his hand.]

S-shit!

[But he can't help but laugh, a weak, coughing laugh, but a laugh nonetheless.]

D-don't take pictures of me like that!

What's done cannot be undone, bro.

[Like he could delete the picture but he isn't doing that?

This is the best he can do. Dirk wants to figure out what to do. When he sees a problem, he figures out the solution and then just does it. But what's the solution here? Research? What is there to pick up? How people leave is as mysterious as how people arrive, and they've never managed to catch sight of that.

Maybe the Monolith needs a different kind of investigating. But right now, Dirk wants to focus on hanging out with a friend.]

[He just groans and buries his head back on his shoulder. He's smiling, though, so the distaction was successful. And he pops the orange slice back into his mouth to get the last of the juice because look. Oranges are important.

The worry isn't gone, but he's shoving it back, forcing himself to focus on the present, and the friends he has with him. Not the ones who are gone.]

Is there anything your sunglasses can't do...?

Be a good home for an emergent consciousness.

[Well. They weren't, though. More helpfully,]

I've been modifying it to suit what I need since I was a kid. Most of its features are geared towards supporting the user in a situation very like ours. Part of that meant designing them for audiovisual input so I could get support from my robots if I ever got into a situation I couldn't get myself out of.

It turns out those features come in handy for getting candid photos of your bros.

[And you will never know when you're safe or not. CREEPY.

Vaguely, at least. Honestly, Dirk just wants to take stupid pictures and share them with his friends. So sue him.]

[...He was trying for a lighthearted conversation topic, Dirk. You really are bad at this.]

Emergent consciousness... are you talking about the AI you built...?

[Because as fuzzy as it feels to try to think while mildly feverish, he does remember a mention about Dirk building something on shades. Or was it the size of shades? Maybe he's just confused.

He sets the now-juiceless orange slice on the side of the plate and just takes another, repeating the process. It's like OJ, but cruder.]

[SHUT UP STOP... being right...

He is so bad at this.]

That's the one.

I don't know if you're feeling good enough for this, so just tell me it's a pass if it's too much. Do you want me to teach you how the program to hatch the egg works?

...

[Honestly, he feels like shit. And he probably won't retain it anyway, and he doesn't want Dirk to waste his time. But--]

Yeah, I want to learn.

[Sets the orange slice down and shifts in his chair, trying to get more upright. He only succeeds in losing one of his blankets and ends up in the exact same spot he had been in. Just now with a quiet whine of distress, because that blanket is now Gone Forever.]

[There's a pause.

Dirk stands up, then bends down. Blanket is acquired. He grabs the blanket and tosses it over to Hinata.]

Yo. Where do you sleep?

[He makes a grab for said blanket and misses. Fortunately it still lands on him, so he can drag it back up to his chin.]

Thanks... I usually sleep wherever there's room, I try to stay out of the way.

[He a pushover and he feels bad. No real territorial claims from him!]

Sometimes I just pick a spot out of the way in here since it's usually pretty quiet. When everyone's feeling better, I want to try to get more private rooms, or even just smaller rooms... I don't want to claim any of the private rooms in case anyone else wants them, you know?

[he's rambling. Stop him.]

Okay. You can sleep in the Magister's room.

[With this decided, Dirk decides to try to pick up Hinata in a bundle of blankets and carry him there.

Princess style, because Hinata is sick.]

Wha-- whoa, oi! Dirk!!

[He flails a little, because wtf he's not looking to get princess-carried by a guy?! How uncool...]

Put me down, what are you doing?!

Taking care of the diseased.

[Hinata is not being put down. Hinata is being carried over to the Magister's room, not at flashstep speed simply because he thinks it might make Hinata feel queazier. Dirk is being delicate with him because friends don't make friends vomit, and not even friends want that vomit to be on them.]

N-no, stop it, I'm fine!

[His voice is a little quieter once Dirk starts actually moving, though, because struggling too much is bad for his nausea and leaves him all but clinging to the other boy, eyes closed in both embarrassment, and in an effort not to make himself vomit. Friends definitely don't want friends covered in puke.]

I was resting in the library, you don't have to take me somewhere to sleep...

The library has too much foot traffic for sleep.

[So Dirk is making sure Hinata is okay by letting him nap in the quiet family space.]

...

[He wants to pout, but that's too childish. He wants to keep arguing, but that's too exhausting. Normally he's not one to back down from an argument until he's proven wrong, but in a case like this... hasn't he already gotten enough of a rebuttal?]

Fine. But don't think you're... getting out of explaining how the egg program works, [he mutters, defeated.]

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